Paper pattern

Category: Romance and Relationships
Regulary, I can't help but hearing people around me that are being questioned about their plans to have a family and how the clock is ticking and we are not doing something about it.
Our parents, back in the day, were married and had kids at our age, many of them had a fairly organized plan of life, and for many of them, the search was definitelly over.
Us, the children of those parents, were brought up with a drawing on paper of what our lives should be and when it should be... only to find that now a days is harder to fullfill outdated customs or plans... mostly because now we have more options, life isn't just about populating the planet.
Then, in my case, and I'm sure in the case of so many others... I haven't found a way to hold on to the person I think that might come close to that paper pattern that I drew and have been modifying over the years.
Recently, just out of luck, I met a guy that was ok... the kind of guy most of my friends say is husband material... but was he really? For me, he was missing the "it" factor. And now... what's the IT factor?
For me, is a gathering of a number of details, desires, models, and so many other things that you witness, live and see along your life that you recognize as the things you might want... drawn into a pattern, that you hold up to everyone you meet and check if they fit. Its not a physical thing, its not a personality thing, not an spiritual thing... it might be something that in my case was missing from the perfect example of the good boy that you dream to take home to mama, and make her proud of your choice.
The problem is not him, is me ... that in my search for perfection have decided that the paper pattern doesn't fit that easily onto everyone.
Then... thinking about it, I realize that, the pattern acts as a baby proofing of sorts, that prevents me from taking chances, and try the old crash and burn... what if no one really fits that pattern... It factor included? Couldn't it be true that someone can grow to fit that drawing and fill the It shoes? doesn't it need to have some of me to become IT??
Now, freak out... the perfect fit might have been discarded a while ago without even notticing... it was fun, but deep down I still believe that It is still out there... Success might not relate to following the pattern, but to actually building a pattern that fits you and not some other rule.